From the Why-Didn't-I-Think-Of-That Department, I can't believe I didn't see these in time for Christmas. I know what I'm adding to my wish list for next year! This has got to be the best use of silicone since, well, you know. I wonder if Sofia Vergara knows they are using her image?
Mar 13, 2010 - Jokes
Two brunettes and a blond were running from the cops. They ran into a barn to hide and saw burlap bags and hid inside them. The cops checked the barn and one cop said "No they're not in here. It's only burlap sacks." The other cop said to kick the bags to make sure no one was in them.
The first cop kicked the first bag with the brunette inside and heard "Meow." The cop reported "There's only a cat in here."
He kicked the second bag with brunette in it and heard "Woof, woof." The cop reported "This bag just has a dog in it."
He kicked the third bag that held the blonde and heard "potatoes."
The first cop kicked the first bag with the brunette inside and heard "Meow." The cop reported "There's only a cat in here."
He kicked the second bag with brunette in it and heard "Woof, woof." The cop reported "This bag just has a dog in it."
He kicked the third bag that held the blonde and heard "potatoes."
DON'T scroll down too fast -- do it slowly, and follow the instructions below exactly, and do the math in your head as fast as you can.
It worked on me.
FOLLOW these instructions one at a time and as QUICKLY as you can!
Then follow the instructions afterwards, ok?
Answer as QUICKLY as possible but don't advance until you've done each of them!!!
What is:
2+2?
4+4?
8+8?
16+16?
Quick! Pick a number between 12 and 5. Got it? Now page down...
The number you picked was 7 right?
Isn't that weird???
It worked on me.
FOLLOW these instructions one at a time and as QUICKLY as you can!
Then follow the instructions afterwards, ok?
Answer as QUICKLY as possible but don't advance until you've done each of them!!!
What is:
2+2?
4+4?
8+8?
16+16?
Quick! Pick a number between 12 and 5. Got it? Now page down...
The number you picked was 7 right?
Isn't that weird???
Interesting things to ponder when you can't go to sleep at night:
Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
How do you KNOW it's new and improved dog food?
Why do they put locks on the doors of 24-hour stores?
Why is it called rush hour when everything moves so slow?
Why is abbreviation such a long word?
If sour milk is used to make yogurt, how do you know when yogurt has gone bad?
Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
Why do we send cargo by ship, and shipments by car?
Why call it a building if it's already been built?
How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?
If the front of your car says 'DODGE', do you really need a horn?
What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?
When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
Do blind eskimos have seeing-eye sled dogs?
Do they have reserved parking for non-handicap people at the Special Olympics?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
How come wrong numbers are never busy?
Why call it "take" a dump, when you leave something behind?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Why call them hot water heaters if the water is already hot?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
When a cow laughs does milk come up its nose?
Why do they put braille on the number pads of drive-through bank machines?
How did a fool and his money GET together?
If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon on the pan?
How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
What's another word for thesaurus?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?
You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?
Why isn't "palindrome" spelled the same way backwards?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
If you have your finger touching the rearview mirror that says -- "objects in mirror are closer than they appear", how can that be possible?
Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC?
If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?
Why does your nose run and your feet smell?
Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?
If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?
Why does "cleave" mean both split apart and stick together?
Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?
Why do they call them "apartments" when they are all stuck together?
If you keep trying to prove Murphy's Law, will something keep going wrong?
Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?
How can someone "draw a blank"?
Shouldn't there be a shorter word for "monosyllabic"?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
What is another word for "thesaurus"?
When they ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?
Why doesn't "onomatopoeia" sound like what it is?
Why do tugboats push their barges?
Why do we sing 'Take me out to the ball game', when we are already there?
Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?
Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?
Why does one get in trouble for WRECKless driving?
Does a fish get cramps after eating?
Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?
Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss"? Shouldn't it be called a "near hit"?
What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of a plane?
Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
How do you KNOW it's new and improved dog food?
Why do they put locks on the doors of 24-hour stores?
Why is it called rush hour when everything moves so slow?
Why is abbreviation such a long word?
If sour milk is used to make yogurt, how do you know when yogurt has gone bad?
Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
Why do we send cargo by ship, and shipments by car?
Why call it a building if it's already been built?
How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?
If the front of your car says 'DODGE', do you really need a horn?
What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?
When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
Do blind eskimos have seeing-eye sled dogs?
Do they have reserved parking for non-handicap people at the Special Olympics?
Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?
How come wrong numbers are never busy?
Why call it "take" a dump, when you leave something behind?
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
Why call them hot water heaters if the water is already hot?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
When a cow laughs does milk come up its nose?
Why do they put braille on the number pads of drive-through bank machines?
How did a fool and his money GET together?
If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon on the pan?
How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
What's another word for thesaurus?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?
You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?
Why isn't "palindrome" spelled the same way backwards?
You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
If you have your finger touching the rearview mirror that says -- "objects in mirror are closer than they appear", how can that be possible?
Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC?
If someone invented instant water, what would they mix it with?
Why does your nose run and your feet smell?
Why does an alarm clock "go off" when it begins ringing?
If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?
Why does "cleave" mean both split apart and stick together?
Why is it, whether you sit up or sit down, the result is the same?
Why do they call them "apartments" when they are all stuck together?
If you keep trying to prove Murphy's Law, will something keep going wrong?
Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?
How can someone "draw a blank"?
Shouldn't there be a shorter word for "monosyllabic"?
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
What is another word for "thesaurus"?
When they ship styrofoam, what do they pack it in?
If 75% of all accidents happen within 5 miles of home, why not move 10 miles away?
Why doesn't "onomatopoeia" sound like what it is?
Why do tugboats push their barges?
Why do we sing 'Take me out to the ball game', when we are already there?
Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?
Why is there only ONE Monopolies Commission?
Why does one get in trouble for WRECKless driving?
Does a fish get cramps after eating?
Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?
Why is it when two planes almost hit each other it is called a "near miss"? Shouldn't it be called a "near hit"?
What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of a plane?
Pics
Mar 13, 2010 - Pics
fantasy
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