Fox Network Loses Two of Its Biggest Stars

A nation of Married With Children fans is in mourning today upon learning that the breasts that helped launch the Fox Network are no longer attached to their owner, Christina Applegate.  Applegate, who starred in the long-running Fox sitcom, was the closest thing to free porn in the days before the Internet, and pioneered the method for launching small television networks by turning cleavage into ratings, which was later successfully copied by other Hollywood hopefuls, such as The WB's Nikki Cox.